When I first heard Orange Juice, but more specifically Edwyn Collins, I shuttered. I was ”icked out to the max!,” as I used to say when I was nine. It reminded me of sticky, hot summers with heat rash on my embarrassing little boy titties. It made me remember when I was in junior high school, constantly hiding my twelve year-old boners from everyone, especially Mrs. Goetz, an owl-eyed Biology teacher who stared at me with an all too knowing gaze. She was a Mormon.
But it creped up on me like a horny uncle in the night. In Edwyn’s simultaneously swooning and crackling voice, I found the true meaning of love. If you haven’t figured it out yet, this is meant to be a review of The Glasgow School (Domino), a near perfect collection of some of the best recording by the seminal (does this word also mean sperm?) Scottish band. But truth be told, it goes for anything they ever recorded. They are true blue in the absolutely truest sense. Northern soul is an expression often affixed to them, but I just wanta call it fuckin’ music. Fun fuckin’…know what I mean?
Anyway, It took me a while before I got it. It’s one of my very favorite things to do…(ah the simple joys of maidenhood)…go to a friend’s house who’s never heard them before, slip it into the machine and then just watch their expressions as Edwyn opens his pretty little Glaswegian mouth. Orange Juice is one of the greatest bands that ever made music.
emile
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